Funny Jokes Too Good Not To Share

These funny jokes are so good you may not be able to control your laughter. They say the best things in life are free; there’s nothing like a good laugh to start the day off right.

Whether it’s before the school bus arrives, during something stressful, or for no reason at all, humor is a fun, healthy way to help create a good mood. When it comes to funny jokes, they don’t come any more hilarious than our awesomely large collection. The laugh is on us – enjoy!

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Funny Jokes

We all love a good joke, and these are super funny. So much so that you feel it’s your duty to share them with the world so take a few minutes to enjoy this hilarious collection of golden nuggets!

Really Funny Jokes

What does a panda use to fry eggs?
A pan. Duh.

Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts. (More Halloween Puns)

If you were in a candy shop and you were about to die what kind of candy would you get?
A lifesaver.

What do you call an old snowman?

What race is never run?
A swimming race.

What’s the slipperiest country?

Why can’t you say a joke while standing on ice?
Because it might crack up.

funny jokes meme.


Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?
Because it ran out of juice.

What do you get if you cross a fridge and a stereo?
Cool music.

Check out our Funny Dad Jokes page.

Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?
He wanted to go to high school.

How does a train eat?
It goes chew-chew.

How did the egg get up the mountain?
It scrambled up.

What do cows say when they want someone to get out of the way?
Moooove over.

Funny and Yet Corny Jokes

Short Jokes

What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk.

Why was the student’s report card wet?
It was below C level.

What kind of bow can’t be tied?
A rainbow.

How did the farmer mend his pants?
With cabbage patches.

How do you repair a broken tomato?
Tomato paste.

What did the hamburger name his daughter?

What kind of egg did the bad chicken lay?
A deviled egg.

Check out our really corny jokes and humor.

Why did the baby strawberry cry - funny jokes

Knock-Knock Jokes

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s There?
Mo: Anita.
Joe: Anita who?
Mo: Anita to borrow a pencil.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Icy.
Mo: Icy who?
Joe: Icy what you are doing.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Watson.
Mo: Watson who?
Joe:Watson on tv tonight?

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Yaw.
Joe: Yaw who?
Mo: Are you a cowboy?

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Wire.
Joe: Wire who?
Mo: Wire you always asking ‘who’s there’?

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Cook.
vCook who?
Joe: Hey, who are you calling cuckoo?

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Abbot.
Mo: Abbot who?
Joe: Abbot you don’t know who this is.

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Viper.
Joe: Viper who?
vViper nose, it’s running.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Spell.
Mo: Spell who?
Joe: W-H-O.

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Woo.
Joe: Woo who?
Mo: Don’t get so excited, it’s just a joke.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Frostbite.
Mo: Frostbite who?
Joe: Frostbite yer food, then chew it.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s There?
Joe: Alice.
Mo: Alice who?
Joe: Alice fair in love and war.

You might like: Short and funny tongue twisters.


Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s There?
Mo: Annie.
Joe: Annie Who?
Mo: Annie thing you can do, I can do better.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Arfur.
Mo: Arfur who?
Joe: Arfur got.

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Guitar.
Joe: Guitar who?
Mo: Guitar coats, it’s cold outside.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Nana.
Mo: Nana who?
Joe: Nana your business.

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Canoe.
Joe: Canoe who?
Mo: Canoe help me with my homework?

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Justin.
Mo: Justin who?
Joe: Justin time for school.

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: B-4.
Mo: B-4 who?
Joe: B-4 you go to school, do your homework.

Mo: Knock, knock.
Joe: Who’s there?
Mo: Dewey.
Joe: Dewey who?
Mo: Dewey have to go to school today?

Joe: Knock, knock.
Mo: Who’s there?
Joe: Iona.
Mo: Iona who?
Joe: Iona new car.

More Knock Knock Jokes.

So Clean You Can Tell Your Mom

Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow before he went to sleep?
So he could have sweet dreams.

What do you get when you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.

Why did the robber take a bath?
Because he wanted to make a clean getaway.

What streets do ghosts haunt?
Dead ends.

What did the penny say to the other penny?
We make perfect cents.

What music are balloons scared of?
Pop music.

Why can’t you take a nap during a race?
Because if you snooze, you lose.

What do you call a book that’s about the brain?
A mind reader.

Why did the baby strawberry cry?
Because his parents were in a jam.

What is the fruitiest lesson?
History, because it’s full of dates.

See 73 Spring Riddles.

Good Jokes

Why did the skeleton go to the barbecue?
Because he wanted some spare ribs.

Who ate his victims two-by-two?
Noah’s Shark.

What do you call a funny mountain?

What did the candle say to the other candle?
I’m going out tonight.

Why did the traffic light turn red?
You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street.

How do you make an Octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles.

Why should you take a pencil to bed?
To draw the curtains.

What do you get when you cross a cow and a lawnmower?
A lawnmooer.

What kind of button won’t unbutton?
A bellybutton.

Why do girls scouts sell cookies?
They wanna make a sweet first impression.

What kind of berry has a coloring book?
A crayon-berry.

What’s a light-year?
The same as a regular year, but with fewer calories.

Tell Me a Joke

How much does it cost a pirate to get earrings?
A buccaneer.

Why did the police go after the baseball kid?
Because he stole a base.

What is a spaceman’s favorite chocolate?
A marsbar.

What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark?
A bird that will talk your ear off.

What do you get when you cross a ghost and a cat ?
A scaredy cat.

Why did the sun go to school?
To get brighter.

What has a foot but no legs?
A snail.

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a chihuahua?
Pooched eggs.

Knee Slappers

What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu?
One needs tweetment and the other requires an oinkment.

A guy showed the damaged remains of his luggage to his lawyer and said, “I want to sue the airline.” The lawyer replied, “You don’t have much of a case.”

What do you call a goat that knows martial arts?
Karate Kid.

What do you call a hippie’s wife?

Batman and Robin walk into a bar…because they can’t fly.

If the Energizer Bunny was arrested, would he be charged with battery?

What cookie makes you rich?
A fortune cookie.

When do astronauts eat?
At Launch Time.

Throwing sharp objects is really bad… in some people’s eyes.

John: Doc, I need help; I can’t get enough of Twitter.
Doc: John, I’m sorry I don’t follow you.

What washes up on very small beaches?

A man on the dance floor is break dancing, moonwalking, backflipping, and making all kinds of dance moves. The wife turns to her husband and says, “See that guy? Fifteen years ago he proposed to me, and I turned him down.” The husband says, “Looks like he’s still celebrating!”

By Andy Atticus

Andy writes about humor, sports, and business.


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