Sharing funny love quotes with your partner can be romantic and add more spice to your relationship. No relationship can last long without having a dose of humor and fun every now and then. Humor has the power to bring a couple closer and provide a new and different perspective about each other.
You may be married or just starting to see each other, it is always great to share funny love quotes every now and then. You will be amazed how your words can have a magical effect on your partner and your relationship. Give them a reason to laugh together and your bond will become stronger. Here are some funny and humorous love quotes for everyone to spend some great time together laughing and building stronger relationships.
Funny Quotes About Love
- In love, somehow, a man’s heart is always either exceeding the speed limit or getting parked in the wrong place.
Helen Rowland - The sincerest love is the love of food.
George Bernard Shaw - Where love is the case, the doctor is an ass.
English Proverb - Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
Jules Renard - I can’t make you love me. But I can fill my pantry with your favorite snacks and offer you a weekend stipend of $75.
Rob Delaney - Love is like a Rhino, short-sighted, but always willing to find a way.
Unknown - Don’t make love by the garden gate, love is blind but the neighbors ain’t.
Unknown - We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.
Dr. Seuss
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Laugh Out Loud Quotes on Love
- I went home with this French guy ’cause he said something adorable, like, ‘I have an apartment.’
Amy Schumer - I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx - I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Steve Martin - Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.
Will Ferrell - The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.
Milton Berle - If you text “I love you” to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is – they don’t love you back.
Chelsea Peretti - I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right.
Richard Pryor - My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.
Gary Shandling - I was on a date with this really hot model. Well, it wasn’t really a date-date. We just ate dinner and saw a movie. Then the plane landed.
Dave Attell
Funny I Love You Quotes
- I love you. You annoy me more than I ever thought possible. But I want to spend every irritating minute with you.
Unknown - I love you more than a herd of wildebeest love stampeding Mufasa!
Unknown - You are my favorite pain in the ass!
Unknown - My favorite part of you is the better half; Me!
Unknown - I love you more than pizza!
Unknown
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Humorous Sayings for Him
- A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.
Tim Allen - What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.
Cindy Garner - The bravest thing that men do
The bravest thing that men do is love women.
Mort Sahl - I don’t have a boyfriend right now. I’m looking for anyone with a job that I don’t have to support.
Anna Nicole Smith
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For Her
- There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
Chris Rock - The great question, which I have not been able to answer is: what does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud - LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder… It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.
Ambrose Bierce - Women love a self-confident bald man.
Larry David - Nothing spoils romance so much as a sense of humor in the woman.
Oscar Wilde - My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in.
Unknown
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Really Funny Love Quotes
- Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.
George Burns - Love is the same as like except you feel sexier.
Judith Viorst - Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator.
Helen Gurley Brown - Love is sharing your popcorn.
Charles Schultz (Simple, funny love quotes are the best) - If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
Alan King - I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonette
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- It is with true love as it is with ghosts; everyone talks about it, but few have seen it.
Francois De La Rochefoucauld - If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.
Fran Lebowitz - I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
Woody Allen - Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
Albert Einstein - You can’t put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories.
Melanie Clark
Tip: These funny love quotes make great captions for photos on social media like Facebook and Instagram.
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Quotations about Relationships
- Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.
Natasha Leggero - Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.
Richard Jeni - Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
Unknown - If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools.
Katherine Mansfield - A kiss is a rosy dot over the ‘I’ of loving.
Cerano de Bergerac - What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.
Pearl Bailey - My wife and I were happy for 20 years – then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
Love and Marriage
- Love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.
Jewish Proverb - Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.
Rose Franken - You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
Henny Youngman - When you’re in love, it’s the most glorious two-and-a-half days of your life.
Richard Lewis - Love, at first sight, is possible, but it pays to take a second look.
Unknown - True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
Erich Segal - The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows nothing.
Blaise Pascal - Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.
Joan Crawford - The only true love is love at first sight; second sight dispels it.
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Romantic Quotes
- I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner - Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.
Samuel Lover - An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
Agatha Christie - Romance is the icing, but love is the cake.
Unknown - Romantic love is a mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one.
Fran Lebowitz - All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.
Charles M. Schulz - Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.
Erma Bombeck - I love you like a fat kid loves cake.
Unknown - To keep your marriage brimming; With love in the loving cup… Whenever you’re wrong admit it; Whenever you’re right, shut up.
Ogden Nash - There is nothing better for the spirit or the body than a love affair. It elevates the thoughts and flattens the stomach.
Barbara Hower - When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there’s a reason.
Molly McGee – From Fibber McGee and Molly fame - Money can’t buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.
Christopher Marlowe
— Liz Adams
Liz writes about relationships, pop culture, and travel.
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